


Never say Anger

by lalois



Category: Kanjani8 (Band)
Genre: Boys Being Boys, Fluff and Crack, Hollywood, M/M, Phone Calls & Telephones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-30
Updated: 2017-06-30
Packaged: 2018-11-21 16:49:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11361546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lalois/pseuds/lalois
Summary: Subaru and Ohkura attended the international Spiderman: Homecoming movie première in Los Angeles, together with Tom Holland, Robert Downey Jr and a lot of other Hollywood stars. Ryo did not.





	Never say Anger

**Author's Note:**

> The title is an obvious pun of the Japanese theme song “never say never” that Yasu wrote for the movie.

TOKYO 

The melody of the mobile phone was so annoying that Ryo lost count of the number of CDs and tracks he had started playing on the stereo aloud in his apartment in order not to hear it.  
But after half an hour of listening to such music, he felt even more nervous than before, so he shut the stereo, he picked up his phone and turned off the loud tones.

Even so, the mobile kept buzzing on the table.  
He threw it amidst the sheets in his bedroom.  
Even so, he couldn't help but looking at the despicable item.  
So that in the end, he picked up.

> Hi, Ryochan! < a sweet voice said.  
"I'm not going to talk to you. Sayonara!" Ryo hissed, hanging up immediately.

LOS ANGELES

"He hung up," Ohkura told Subaru, sighing.  
"Well you're not going to give up just because his mood is slightly bad, are you? It's kind of routine, after all..."  
"Uhm... but he sounded pretty enraged this time."

Subaru merely shrugged, patting him on one shoulder.  
"Well, I suppose I'll be taking the shower first, Ohkura," he informed his band mate.  
"No problem. I'll... try with Ryochan again," he sighed.

TOKYO

Ryo swore he was about to throw his mobile phone outta the window straight away.

Twenty missed calls.  
Twenty fucking missed calls coming from the USA.

He scratched his head for the nth time.  
He needed to do something. He couldn't simply strangle both of them to death, after all. There would have been unpleasant consequences.

He picked up the incoming call once again.

"I said I am NOT GOING TO TALK TO YOU EVER AGAIN, OHKURA!"

> But Ryochan, Shibuyan wants to say hi, and- <  
"I'm not going to talk to him either!," Ryo shouted. "I'm not going to talk to BOTH OF YOU ever again, can you tell?! I'm so pissed off! So damn pissed off! I HATE YOU! BOTH OF YOU!

> But Ryochan, we- <  
"I don't care a damn fuck! I don't! Can you guess how envious I am?! You went TO THE USA and you met HIM. HIM. Robert Downey Junior in person. And you EVEN talked to him! Took photos! While I'm stuck in here for playing a stupid stupid stupid stupid wimpy husband for the nth time and I couldn't attend! I'm so pissed off with you two! It's not fair! It's so UNFAIR!! I HATE YOU!! ARE YOU LISTENING, OHKURA? I HATE YOU AND FOREVER WILL, AND IT'S NOT ANY DIFFERENT FOR SUBARU-KUN EITHER, BECAUSE-"

LOS ANGELES

Judging from the scared expression marking Ohkura's face, Subaru thought he had to be of help very quickly, so he suddenly snatched the phone from the other's hand.  
"Ryo, Ohkura says he'll be offering you a blowjob as soon as-"  
"WHAT?!!" the drummer shrieked, going pink.

"Please don't scream like that Ohkura, I was talking on the phone," Subaru quietly warned him. "Sorry Ryo, as I was saying, a blowjob as soon as we get back home, to apologize. How does that sound?"

"Hey, I never- Shibuyan, give it back to me! Give me back my mobile, please, I-"  
"Hey, Ryo, are you still thinking about it? I said Ohkura-"  
"I NEVER SAID that, senpai!," Ohkura soundly protested. "Ryochan, don't listen to him, I- Shibuyan, PLEASE GIVE IT BACK TO ME!"

TOKYO

Ryo could hear some rustle over the line.  
That did not help improve his mood, anyway.

> Ryochan, I need to- <  
"I don't care a fuck, Ohkura! Sayonara!" Ryo shouted, before hanging up once more.  
But the mobile started buzzing again.  
Ryo cursed openly.

"Ohkura, I said-"  
> Don't you wanna know what he told me? < Ohkura quickly asked him, before he could hang up again.  
"No," Ryo uttered.  
> You hesitated. I noticed, and don't even try to say no, Ryochan, please... < the drummer told him.

LOS ANGELES

No signals of Ryo hanging up yet.  
Ohkura's frantic heartbeat accelerated, and he went on.

"I told Robert-san that so long ago, the guy I love introduced me to some of his works and made me become a HUUUUUUGE fan of him every since. Huge, huge, huge. I added that I deeply adore him now. And he said..."

Silence over the line.  
Apparently, Ryo was still listening.

"... He said you must be a good guy and I have to treasure you the best I can," Ohkura concluded, in a low voice. "I assured him I will. Of course I will. Always."

TOKYO

He must be a good guy. You have to treasure him the best you can.  
Robert Downey Jr.  
 

Ryo swallowed, then closed his lids.  
"Tell Subaru I need to talk to him. Right now," he ordered then, in a collected voice.

> Sure. Wait a mom- Shibuyan, are you done? Ryochan's there! <

> Oi, Ryo. Better now? <  
"Did he really say that?"  
> You mean, Ohkura? <  
"No, I mean Robert-sama. Did he really reply like that to Ohkura?"  
> Ow, er... no idea. I cannot understand his English, he talked a bit... I don't know, I guess he had some king of slurred speech. I didn't get a word, in the end. I just nodded eagerly. That does always work. <

Ryo pressed his thumbs on his brows.  
He was sure a migraine was coming up, it was just a matter of seconds.

LOS ANGELES

"So that's it, Ryochan," Ohkura said then, retrieving the phone from Subaru's hand. "Are you still... well, angry?"  
> You'd better hurry up, Ohkura < Ryo's voice told him > to come back home and give me what you promised before <  
"Hey, but I never promis-"  
Ohkura heard the familiar sound of a phone call being suddenly hung up, and he groaned.

Subaru, who had been beside him eavesdropping Ryo's last words, stood up from the bed and patted him again on the shoulder.

"We're safe for this once, dude. S.A.F.E. Good job."


End file.
